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Technical Foul
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Adam Sandler
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1
Look you've got to understand
2
It's just been me and Eleanor for sixty-seven years
3
So she gets nervous around strangers
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I wouldn't show that picture to any one
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Or they might try to take you two guys back to the laboratory
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Listen we got rules in this house, and you better follow
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Them or you'll find yourself outta of here
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This might be harder then I thought
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If you're coming from street, with dirty shoes on your feet
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That's a technical foul
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If you switch the radio to some modern music show
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That's a technical foul
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If you don't shut the door after using the fridgerator
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That's a technical foul, a technical foul
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If you touch the thermostat, you'll get hit with a bat
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'Cause that's a technical foul, you'll feel my wrath
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If your hair clogs the drain, you'll know the meaning of pain
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Cause that's a technical foul, I'll show you no mercy
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This is such bull shit, hey in this house we say bull spit
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Or it's a technical foul, a technical foul
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Let me get this straight
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You expect me to change my entire lifestyle in one night
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Because you guys are a couple of psychotic control freaks
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You got it bub or you can go rot in the gutter
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It's up to you Yankee Doodle
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Well, I don't want to do that
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But let me run a few questions by you
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So I don't screw up accidentally
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If I don't spray Lysol, after moving a bowel
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That's a technical foul, okay?
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If I decide to wash my ass with your monogrammed towel
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That's a technical foul
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Please say, hieney
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If I make fun of your crazy feeties
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Or give sugar cookies to Miss Diabetes
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That's not only technical foul but, possibly a homicide
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Can I sleep past three?
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If you do you'll get a T
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Take a wizz in those flowers
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I'll say hit the showers
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Use this horn as a bong
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Adios Tommy Chong
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Make some long distance calls
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You'll get a kick in the balls
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Can I walk around with my morning erection?
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If you want an automatic ejection
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'Cause that's a technical foul
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But I'd like to see it anyway, just kiddin'
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There are certain rules which apply in one's life
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With your sister, friends or imaginary wife
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I can't believe, I haven't killed myself
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Respect carries over me on the court
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Here with Wigs Magee, and a fury elf
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Whether you're Jewish diabetic or especially short
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She's ironic and he's a troll
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I see, she's strange in my royal carry
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My imaginary wife is short and hairy
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They took my wig, I remember the look in their eyes
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How did my life get stuck in this shit hole?
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Why oh why won't someone retrieve my wig, wig, wig?
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Guess I have to deal with your demands
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But please don't touch me with your alien hands
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I got no right to growl
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The whistle she's on the prowl
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Without my wig, I look like an owl
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Oh, my God, don't laugh at her
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Or it's a technical foul
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Or it's a technical foul
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Or it's a technical foul
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